Infatuation Rules
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Why is online dating so exhausting?

People grow tired of the endless scroll of potential dates available on the apps. Many users become frustrated with the time they spend swiping online, compared to the time they spend actually going on dates.

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Andy Hong feels like he keeps meeting the same woman online: a graduate from a small school in New England who likes to ski and play sports. The twenty-eight-year-old says he has nothing against this kind of woman, but he's not necessarily clicking with them, and knows there are all kinds of people out there with whom he could enjoy a romantic relationship. The repetition is wearing on him, but still the dating app Hinge keeps recommending people from the same mould. “They cater to a type, and they will feed you a type,” Boston-based Hong says of Hinge. The experience has left Hong with what he calls “decision fatigue” – something others refer to as “dating app burnout”. It’s a prevalent phenomenon in the app-based dating world. People grow tired of the endless scroll of potential dates available on the apps. Many users become frustrated with the time they spend swiping online, compared to the time they spend actually going on dates. “From a pure numbers perspective, of a hypothetical 10 people you match with, you'll probably have a solid conversation with seven or eight,” says Hong. “Of those seven to eight, you might net out at like one or two [in-person dates].” These days, however, single people are hard-pressed to not engage with the world of online dating – even though many know it’s hard work, and potentially disappointing. According to a 2019 study, online dating has become a much more likely way to meet a partner than a chance encounter. Yet it can take a toll: a recent survey from UK-based dating app Badoo showed more than three-quarters of singles felt burnt out by unrewarding interactions and inappropriate matches from platforms and apps. Research from Hinge also found a significant portion of its users (61%) were overwhelmed by the modern dating process, and an April 2022 US study showed four in five adults “experienced some degree of emotional fatigue or burnout from online dating”.

Still, people keep using dating apps to find potential partners. It seems that regardless of how bad the experience gets, these apps remain one of the easiest ways to meet people romantically in a world that’s moving increasingly online. If people are going to remain on these apps to find dates, are there ways to mitigate the grind?

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How many couples break up after long-distance?

It turns out that 40 percent of long-distance relationships eventually come to an end. Plus, long-distance relationships that fail when changes aren't planned for are at 28 percent.

Whether we realize it or not, building romantic relationships is a big part of being human. Since February (or love month if you prefer to call it that way) is not over yet, we’re still pursuing the numbers behind romantic relationships. Last week, we did a closer look at the costs of falling in and out of love. Today, we’re putting the spotlight on long-distance relationships!

Long-Distance Relationship Statistics: What the Numbers Have to Say

“Do long distance relationships work?” remains one of the top relationship queries on Google. For this reason, we’re curious to find out if loving someone whom you can’t physically share (and experience!) your daily life with is a wild goose chase or genuinely possible. Bring on the video calls on odd hours of the day, care packages, watching movies together (yet apart) on Skype! The infographic and charts below are based on the most recent statistics collected by our resident data scientist.

Figures at a glance:

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