Infatuation Rules
Photo by ArtHouse Studio Pexels Logo Photo: ArtHouse Studio

Why do narcissists ignore you?

Often, a narcissist will retaliate by ignoring you. This is a means to punish you for puncturing their delusions. They're also avoiding you because a narcissist's sense of self is too unstable to resolve conflict. They are putting you in a position to make you desperate for their approval.

Do dating couples talk everyday?
Do dating couples talk everyday?

While it's totally fine if you and your boo chat on a daily basis, experts say that — in a healthy relationship — you shouldn't feel obligated to...

Read More »
What are the earliest signs of gaslighting?
What are the earliest signs of gaslighting?

10 Signs of Gaslighting Behaviour Blatant Lies. You know the person is lying, often and with ease, yet they say they do not recognise this in their...

Read More »

If you're wondering why a narcissist ignores you, then you're probably in that situation right now. If you are - take a deep breath and try to remember that it's not your fault. A narcissist doesn't ignore you because you've done something wrong: a narcissist ignores you because they're a narcissist. You might be left wondering what you did wrong. You might be replaying your actions or filled with guilt over them. You might feel stuck in the situation because their refusal to communicate with you is preventing you from resolving the situation. If you are - take a deep breath and try to remember that it's not your fault. A narcissist is an expert at ignoring people. It's one of the biggest tools in a narcissist's toolbox. It hurts to be ignored. And, that's one of the reasons why a narcissist ignores you . And, it can be especially difficult for people who have attachment or self-esteem issues. Sadly, a narcissist knows this and seeks out people who are most vulnerable to being controlled by their tactics.

Available Narcissistic Personality Disorder Counselors View all

Why a Narcissist Ignores You: To Control You

They ignore you because they want to control you. One of the main reasons why a narcissist ignores you is that they want to control you. More likely, they want to regain control of you. A narcissist uses ignoring people as a way to punish them. Especially if they feel like you are pulling away. Or, you've inflicted a narcissistic injury on them. A narcissist has a fundamentally unstable sense of self. They build up narcissistic delusions of self-importance to fuel their insatiable need for validation. Anything or anyone who threatens these delusions is causing narcissistic injury. Often, a narcissist will retaliate by ignoring you. This is a means to punish you for puncturing their delusions. They're also avoiding you because a narcissist's sense of self is too unstable to resolve conflict. They are putting you in a position to make you desperate for their approval. And, making the resolution of the conflict your responsibility.

Why a Narcissist Ignores You: They Enjoy It

Another reason why a narcissist ignores you is that they enjoy it. Narcissists seek validation and praise. This is called narcissistic supply. And, a narcissist's need for supply can never be filled. They will continue to seek it and find means to get it. They often start by lavishing you with attention and praise and enjoy the feeling of receiving it in return. As your relationship with them lengthens, they will continue to escalate their behavior to get that supply from you. Ignoring you is one of these tactics. They want a narcissistic supply by you chasing them, asking for forgiveness, and being upset about their behavior. Your reaction to being ignored brings them pleasure. These are all forms of narcissistic supply and feeling this way is why a narcissist ignores you.

Why a Narcissist Ignores You: It Boosts Their Ego

Does giving space always work?
Does giving space always work?

Needing Space Doesn't Mean the Relationship Is Over But a healthy relationship gets even better when each person has the opportunity to pursue...

Read More »
What do scammer ask for?
What do scammer ask for?

Scammers will ask you for money. Once they gain your trust, they'll ask for your help to pay medical expenses (for them or a family member), buy...

Read More »

Another reason why a narcissist ignores you is that they want to boost their ego. They seek out people who are especially anxious about being alone: people with abandonment or attachment issues. They also seek out particularly empathetic people. People who are giving so that they can be on the receiving end of the empath's emotional generosity. Empaths are prone to sensing and soothing the emotions around them. They are perfect prey for a narcissist who ignores you to be soothed. They are using your fear of being alone against you. Being ignored makes you feel devalued and that's another reason why a narcissist ignores you. Devaluing others raises their perceived worth. And, that's another form of narcissistic supply.

Why a Narcissist Ignores You: They're Not Actually Ignoring You

One of the ironies of why a narcissist ignores you is that they're not actually ignoring you. They are putting on a show of ignoring you. They are counting the days that they've gone without contacting you. They are imagining how much it must hurt you. They are enjoying how confused and hurt you are. A narcissist is thinking obsessively about you while they pretend to ignore you. Here's a quick test you can try to see if this is happening. When you suspect you're being ignored by a narcissist: ignore them back! They hate this. And, if they notice this: it proves that they were only putting on a show of ignoring you. And, they need an audience. Ignoring them back is like getting out of your seat and leaving the theater. They're suddenly performing for no one. Why a narcissist ignores you: they need to feel needed The final reason a narcissist ignores you is that they need to feel needed. This is another form of narcissistic supply. They love that you love them. They love that you're interested in them. They love that you want to talk to them. And they love that ignoring you makes you want to do all of these things more.

Conclusion

What are the A's in a relationship?
What are the A's in a relationship?

One way to improve your relationship with your significant other is to set an intention to give each other on a consistent basis “The Five A's of...

Read More »
How do I make myself look hotter?
How do I make myself look hotter?

Let's take a look at these quick and simple ways to make yourself look more attractive: Always dress elegantly: ... Maintain a good posture and...

Read More »
What is the biggest mistake in marriage?
What is the biggest mistake in marriage?

Marriage Mistakes and How to Fix Them Splitting the housework evenly. ... Having unrealistic expectations of marriage. ... Thinking sexual issues...

Read More »
Does loyalty include love?
Does loyalty include love?

Loyalty means being there for someone through the highs and lows, and staying by their side regardless of the circumstances. Loyalty involves...

Read More »