Infatuation Rules
Infatuation Rules
Photo: Karolina Grabowska
women Researchers asked participants to rate emotional and physical pain of a breakup and found that women tend to be more negatively affected by breakups, reporting higher levels of both physical and emotional pain. While breakups hit women the hardest, they tend to recover more fully.
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Read More »Women experience more emotional pain following a breakup, but they also more fully recover, according to new research from Binghamton University. Researchers from Binghamton University and University College London asked 5,705 participants in 96 countries to rate the emotional and physical pain of a breakup on a scale of one (none) to 10 (unbearable). They found that women tend to be more negatively affected by breakups, reporting higher levels of both physical and emotional pain. Women averaged 6.84 in terms of emotional anguish versus 6.58 in men. In terms of physical pain, women averaged 4.21 versus men's 3.75. While breakups hit women the hardest emotionally and physically, women tend to recover more fully and come out emotionally stronger. Men, on the other hand, never full recover -- they simply move on. According to Craig Morris, research associate at Binghamton University and lead author on the study, the differences boil down to biology. Women have more to lose by dating the wrong person. "Put simply, women are evolved to invest far more in a relationship than a man," Morris said. "A brief romantic encounter could lead to nine months of pregnancy followed by many years of lactation for an ancestral woman, while the man may have 'left the scene' literally minutes after the encounter, with no further biological investment. It is this 'risk' of higher biological investment that, over evolutionary time, has made women choosier about selecting a high-quality mate. Hence, the loss of a relationship with a high-quality mate 'hurts' more for a woman." Conversely, as men have evolved to compete for the romantic attention of women, the loss of a high-quality mate for a man may not "hurt" as much at first, Morris said. "The man will likely feel the loss deeply and for a very long period of time as it 'sinks in' that he must 'start competing' all over again to replace what he has lost -- or worse still, come to the realization that the loss is irreplaceable," he said. Morris said that breakups are important because most of us will experience an average of three by age 30, with at least one affecting us strongly enough that it substantially decreases our quality of life for weeks or months. "People lose jobs, students withdraw from classes, and individuals can initiate extremely self-destructive behavior patterns following a breakup," he said. "With better understanding of this emotional and physical response to a breakup -- Post Relationship Grief -- we can perhaps develop a way to mitigate its effects in already high-risk individuals."
In six weeks, you may know that you're thinking about this new person often. You'll know if you're curious about how his head works; you may begin...
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men Despite the age-old stereotype that men are less emotionally invested in relationships than women, a new study has found that men are in fact...
Read More »A strong and healthy relationship is built on the three C's: Communication, Compromise and Commitment. Think about how to use communication to make your partner feel needed, desired and appreciated.
February may be the month of love, but it takes more than chocolates, flowers and dinner dates to make a relationship work. A strong and healthy relationship is built on the three C’s: Communication, Compromise and Commitment. Whether starting a new relationship or celebrating decades of marriage, here is a refresher course in the three C’s:
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