Infatuation Rules
Photo: Asad Photo Maldives
The workplace. The workplace is where most affairs begin. It doesn't hurt that we usually dress nicely and are on “good behavior” at work. Plus, having shared passions about projects (or mutual annoyance at a boss or co-worker) provides the perfect breeding ground for an affair.
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Read More »Feeling comfortable with someone quickly can be a good sign, but saying "I love you," making plans to meet the parents, move in together, or get married early on can be signs your partner is trying too hard to get close before fully knowing you. "Love bombing goes hard and fast," Spinelli says.
Love bombing is considered unhealthy by many relationship experts because it makes it harder for the other person to maintain their personal boundaries. According to psychoanalyst Babita Spinelli, L.P., the goal of love bombing is to make the recipient feel indebted to or dependent on the love-bomber. Love bombing can sometimes be mistaken for the honeymoon stage of a relationship, but the two have some distinct differences. "In the honeymoon phase, love is shown by a desire to focus on what the other person likes or is interested in," Spinelli tells mbg. "Gestures tend to be thoughtful and not with an intent to impress." Love-bombers, on the other hand, will shower their partner with attention and expect recognition from them and others. "Love bombing is also about control, creating dependency and idealization," Spinelli adds. "The honeymoon phase is about exhilarated burgeoning feelings of a new relationship."
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