When should you not take your ex back?

These are six important reasons as to why you need to avoid getting back with your ex for the sake of your mental health: You would be settling. ... Some things do not change. ... It can get emotionally abusive. ... You will end up in the same cycle. ... It might feel like an emotionally heavy task. ... Unresolved issues might come back.

healthshots.com - 6 reasons why getting back together with your ex is a truly terrible idea

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The period right after the breakup can be extremely difficult, especially if you parted ways on bad terms. Over time, things do get better and you begin to heal emotionally. This, however, doesn’t mean that you don’t miss the time you spent with your former partner and the memories you made together. At times, such thoughts might even result in you doubting the decision to break up. These memories and the emotions you attach to them are experienced quite commonly. Hence, you’ll find many couples who get back together after a massive break up. What happens after that, though? Well, they repeat the same mistakes, behavioural patterns and end up hurting each other further. In such a situation, it is definitely not advisable to get back with your ex because it will result in prolonging emotional trauma. Also, read: A psychologist reveals 4 pieces of bad relationship advice you must never follow These are six important reasons as to why you need to avoid getting back with your ex for the sake of your mental health:

1. You would be settling

It doesn’t matter who initiated the breakup, the bottom line is that it happened. It happened because it wasn’t serving anyone well. Maybe you thought it isn’t working out or that you deserve better. So, going back to the same person now would be a clear case of settling, denying yourself the happiness and mental peace you deserve.

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2. Some things do not change

The basic nature of a person doesn’t change overnight. You shouldn’t fall for any changes that you notice. You might get into the same cycle and situations. If you’re in such a situation, it is important to ask yourself why these changes didn’t come about when you were still together. This question will put things in perspective for you.

3. It can get emotionally abusive

Imagine you’re back with your ex. Now what? It could result in your partner taking you for granted and putting you through the same emotional distress knowing fully well that you will come back to them. This is clearly a form of emotional abuse that you need to cut out of your life.

4. You will end up in the same cycle

You’ve probably noticed people breaking up, getting back together and then separating all over again. If anything, you’ve been a part of such a cycle yourself. Fall back on your experience instead of repeating the same mistake and making this cyclic. It is only going to cost you your mental sanity.

5. It might feel like an emotionally heavy task

When things are complicated, getting back with your ex can feel like a task that will leave you emotionally drained. You might be putting in extra emotional effort this time to make things work. Investing your time and energy might result in ignoring your mental health. Also, read: Are you in a toxic relationship? Here are 5 tell-tale signs to look out for

6. Unresolved issues might come back

You broke up for a reason. Ask yourself if it was addressed and solved properly. If your answer is no, there’s a high chance that it will very much be a part of your equation with your former partner. Spare yourself the trouble, especially if your ex is not willing to resolve the issue. Loving someone comes naturally but if this love hurts you then you’d rather stay away from it!

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How to make your ex love you again?

Snag your ex's eye by reaching back out, spending time together, reminding them of happy memories, and acting casual and confident. Finally, discuss getting back together. Talk about what went wrong in the past and let your ex know that you're willing to work to be a better partner.

wikihow.com - How to Get Your Ex to Fall for You Again (with Pictures) - wikiHow

This article was co-authored by Lisa Shield . Lisa Shield is a love and relationship expert based in Los Angeles. She has a Master's degree in Spiritual Psychology and is a certified life and relationship coach with over 17 years of experience. Lisa has been featured in The Huffington Post, Buzzfeed, LA Times, and Cosmopolitan. This article has been viewed 1,121,398 times.

Article Summary

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Getting your ex back might not be easy, but you can give yourself the best chance by playing it cool and finding ways to reconnect with them. To avoid scaring your ex away, act casual if you bump into them, and give it some time before you try to contact them again. Once you get back in touch with them, keep things light by chatting about daily events or things that are happening at school or work. If you decide to meet up, ask your ex if they’d like to have coffee or lunch, which seems less serious than evening plans. During your time together, show off your best qualities, like your quirky sense of humor or your empathy, to remind your ex why they fell for you to begin with. To learn how to talk to your ex about getting back together, keep reading!

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