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Did you know that 70 percent of straight unmarried couples breakup within the first year? This is according to a longitudinal study by Stanford sociologist Michael Rosenfeld who tracked more than 3,000 people, married and unmarried straight and gay couples since 2009 to find out what happens to relationships over time. The study found that after five years there was only a 20 percent chance that a couple will break up and that figure dwindles by the time they have been together for ten years. The question is, why do people break up? Why do so many couples break up within a year or two? Experts say there are nine key reasons for why this happens.

1. The first year of a relationship comes with many challenges

In the beginning, you don’t see things as they are in reality, you project what you want to see onto your partner. In the next stage you become more realistic and disillusionment sets in.

2. At certain times relationships are more vulnerable to a breakup

According to a study by David McCandless breakups most frequently happen on Valentine’s day, Spring season, April fool’s day, Monday, Summer holiday, two weeks before Christmas and Christmas day.

3. The truth starts showing

After one year, stuff gets real. You are starting to see through your love and are not always charmed by your love’s ways and habits. By this point, you will either really be attracted to your partner or exceptionally turned off by your partner’s flaws.

4. Love is blind

Studies show that feelings of love lead to a suppression of activity in the areas of the brain controlling critical thought. So, once we feel close to a person, our brain decides that it’s not necessary to assess their character or personality too deeply.

5. People want a return on their investment

Life coach Kali Rogers has found through her research that women want to have an emotional return oninvestment from their relationships. “Once they have committed a certain amount of time — typically six months — they like to hold on as long as possible.”

6. After a year, reality sets in

“After a year or so, the new relationship euphoria begins to wear off, and reality sets in,” Tina B. Tessina, better known as Dr. Romance, explains. “Both partners relax, and stop being on their best behavior. Old family habits assert themselves, and they begin to disagree about things they were tolerant of before,” she says.

7. The great no-no: your partner isn’t generous

It takes a while to find out how generous a person really is. If after a few birthdays and holidays a person realizes that their partner is not generous, they might decide to call it quits. 8. A year is the time when most people determine where the relationship is going A year into a relationship people tend to think in terms of a solid commitment and if that is not forthcoming from one partner, the other person may decide to leave the relationship.

For the full article, visit Hack Spirit.

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What are white flags in a relationship?

Essentially, a white flag is something as simple as giving up your time to be supportive of your partner and experience what they enjoy doing.

stylist.co.uk - Relationship white flags: what are they and how to identify - Stylist

White flags can also be emotional, according to Parker.

In a relationship, particularly long-term, you discover everything there is to know about your partner – their positive traits, and even their slightly annoying habits. At the start of a relationship, preparing for a date means spraying your finest perfume or aftershave on every inch of your body and picking out your nicest clothing. “However, after some time, you have to surrender to the relationship and let your guard down by being your true self. Of course, it can make you feel vulnerable, but it allows us to maintain the healthy relationship we need in our lives, and the vulnerability that we experience from surrendering can increase our satisfaction with one another,” she says. Essentially, a white flag is something as simple as giving up your time to be supportive of your partner and experience what they enjoy doing.

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