Infatuation Rules
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What should you not do on a date?

10 Things NOT To Do On A Date ARRIVE LATE. If you arrive late on the first date, you have basically just fallen at the first handle and will have some serious making up to do from now on. TALK ABOUT EX-GIRLFRIENDS. ... USE YOUR PHONE. ... BE RUDE TO THE WAITER. ... BE DISTRACTED. ... GO TOO INTENSE. ... MAKE HER PAY. ... GET REALLY DRUNK. More items...

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So, you conjured the confidence to ask her out, you somehow managed to woo her into saying yes and she actually turned up to said destination at organised time – it’s a miracle! You think to yourself, but now the real challenge starts – how not to be a total d**k on the first date, and thus ruin any future chance of seeing her again. Follow these simple steps to first date success, or rather, what NOT to do.

DO NOT…

1. ARRIVE LATE

If you arrive late on the first date, you have basically just fallen at the first handle and will have some serious making up to do from now on.

2. TALK ABOUT EX-GIRLFRIENDS

The biggest no-no of all dating rules, no one wants to hear about the love of your life or ‘the one that got away’

3. USE YOUR PHONE

Texting, taking calls, sending snap chats or even scrolling through facebook – Put.It.Away.

4. BE RUDE TO THE WAITER

Don’t think it makes you look authoritative, it doesn’t, it makes you look like a douche.

5. BE DISTRACTED

Not listening to her when she’s speaking, looking over her shoulder or even blatantly checking out other girls, none of this will get you a second date – trust us.

6. GO TOO INTENSE

Don’t talk about your relationship history has already been flagged, but equally there should be no discussions of past sadness – save the DMC until you’ve been dating for at least a month or so.

7. MAKE HER PAY

If you asked her out then either you pay or you go dutch, but never make her pay on the first date.

8. GET REALLY DRUNK

It’s not attractive and there is no way in hell she’ll be impressed by you knocking over glasses or slurring your words.

9. TALK ABOUT YOURSELF ALL THE TIME

While she might be impressed if you climbed everest and saved starving africans whilst also making millions on the stock market, she won’t care at all if that’s all she hears about. Be bashful, and save some trump cards for dates further down the line.

10. ASSUME YOU’LL GO HOME WITH HER

The absolute cardinal sin of inappropriate things to do/think on a first date. If that is your aim then you should probably stop dating altogether and take yourself down to the nearest sticky floored, cheap-shot-selling dive bar and focus your attentions there instead.

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Is it worth it to ask for closure?

The benefits of seeking closure include helping the person who has been left understand what might have happened, as well as improving their future relationships and and their understanding of themselves. “It might even make you realise that this isn't the person you want to be with,” Ambrosius says.

If you’re beating yourself up for feeling the need for clarity post breakup, then stop. It turns out that we, as humans, are hard-wired to search for answers because “people view their lives as a bit of a story”. “We see our lives in the past, present and future,” Ambrosius explains. “It’s sort of made up of puzzles; you put all the pieces together in a puzzle to create your past, to create your present or to create your future. So if everything feels like it’s going fine and then, at one moment, a part of the puzzle breaks, or goes missing, you lose sense of who you are in your story. “Then you start to doubt your past or the decisions you’ve made in your present, and you start to worry about the future. Anything like a break-up (or a redundancy or a bereavement) can start that process because we plan so much. We think we know where we stand in our narrative but as soon as it changes, it throws us off balance. So we need to understand what’s going on around us, because it’s such a difficult situation to deal with if you are the one that’s being left.”

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