Infatuation Rules
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What makes a man ready to commit?

If your man is done thinking about past relationships and wants to move forward with only you, this is a sign he's ready to commit. You two can talk about what you're going to name your future kids, where you want to build your dream house and where you're going to retire together without getting awkward.

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Lindsey Miller

You’ve been dating this awesome guy for a while now and you’re starting to wonder if he’s ever going to be ready to take it to the next level. While it can be hard to tell if he’s ready to commit (whether it’s to upgrade to a serious relationship or to get married), these nine signs of a man who’s ready to start a life with you can help you know:

1. He’s not dwelling on the past

If your man is done thinking about past relationships and wants to move forward with only you, this is a sign he’s ready to commit.

2. He’s comfortable talking about the future

You two can talk about what you’re going to name your future kids, where you want to build your dream house and where you’re going to retire together without getting awkward. Talking about the future comfortably is so important in a committed relationship, so having that be a part of your relationship now means he's ready for more.

3. He brings you along to meet friends and family

If he didn’t think you were going to be a part of his long-term future, he wouldn’t bother letting his family and friends get close to you.

4. He’s open about his finances

Your man can be filthy rich or dirt poor, but you’ll know either way if he's serious about dating you. When he’s ready to commit, he’ll trust you with his finances. You both will be able to talk about your life together and what trips you can afford for your honeymoon.

5. He forgives you

Everyone makes mistakes — it’s just a part of life. If your darling wasn’t ready to commit, he would look for an excuse to get out of the relationship. When he’s ready to be with you forever, he’ll overlook your flaws and forgive your imperfections because he wants you and only you.

6. He would rather be with you than his friends

Friend time is definitely important, but when he would honestly rather watch a movie and order take-out with you than go out with his friends, you’ve found a keeper.

7. He forgets about his phone

When he’s with you, he forgets to check his phone because he’s so interested in what the two of you are doing together. Oh and there's no need to look at that screen because the only person he would care about getting a message from is you.

8. He’s not afraid to be vulnerable

Nothing says commitment and companionship like vulnerability. When he’s ready, he’ll completely let you in and trust you with his heart.

9. He genuinely cares about your life

When he honestly wants to hear about that weird thing your cat coughed up the other day, it’s a sign that he wants to hear and know everything about your life. He’s fascinated with the things that make you the person you are, and he wants nothing more than to be a part of your life. Does your man show these nine signs? While these aren’t the only signs he’s ready to commit to you, they’re a start. Look for these little signs to know if you’re getting into a long-term relationship with your love.

Lindsey Miller, FamilyShare

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How do you know if a guy doesn't want a relationship?

Notice if he often cancels plans with you, demotes you in favor of other friends and projects, or never seems to have time for you. Or perhaps he's always too busy to do things you want to do, but you see him spending time with his people regularly.

Some people do prefer relationships without labels, but importantly, a relationship without labels is still a relationship and still requires clarity around expectations. "Some people may choose not to label their relationship because they're afraid of being tied down too quickly or in a place where they feel trapped," relationship therapist Shena Tubbs, MMFT, LPC, CSAT-C, once told mbg. "However, one should understand that you maintain full autonomy of yourself in every relationship you're in, and you are the one who is responsible for communicating what you need, what you want, and what you don't want. So if you feel you're at a place where you cannot (or don't want) to date one person exclusively, that should be communicated to your partner so that [they] can make a decision about whether that works for them." In other words, saying you "don't do labels" cannot be a stand-in for having a conversation about what you both expect from each other. You two should still be able to get on the same page about whether you're romantically and sexually exclusive, what the expectations you both have for each other are, whether you want your current relationship to be long term, and whether you're interested in eventually living together, getting married, and those sorts of things. It's OK to not want these things, but if he's avoiding telling you how he feels about all this and keeping you in the dark, take that as a red flag.

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