Infatuation Rules
Photo by NATASHA  LOIS Pexels Logo Photo: NATASHA LOIS

What lack of confidence looks like?

Signs of low self-esteem include: saying negative things and being critical about yourself. joking about yourself in a negative way. focusing on your negatives and ignoring your achievements.

What is Solopoly?
What is Solopoly?

What solo polyamory is. Solo polyamory is when someone has intimate relationships with multiple partners but still lives a single lifestyle. For...

Read More »
Why is it important to maintain individuality in a relationship?
Why is it important to maintain individuality in a relationship?

The goal in a relationship is to be close and still maintain an identity as a separate person. When people are in an individuated state, they are...

Read More »

What is self-esteem?

Self-esteem is the way we think about ourselves and the value we place on ourselves. We all criticise ourselves from time to time, but if you often think badly about yourself or judge yourself negatively, you may have low self-esteem. You may not know the cause of your low self-esteem, but there are steps you can take to improve it. Self-esteem is different to self-confidence. Confidence relates to a person’s ability in a particular area of their life. A person can be very confident about their particular abilities, but still have low self-esteem. Achieving confidence in a particular area of life won’t necessarily improve self-esteem.

What are the signs of low self-esteem?

Signs of low self-esteem include:

saying negative things and being critical about yourself

joking about yourself in a negative way

focusing on your negatives and ignoring your achievements

blaming yourself when things go wrong

thinking other people are better than you

thinking you don’t deserve to have fun

not accepting compliments

avoiding challenges for fear of failing

being overly upset by disapproval or criticism

feeling sad, depressed, anxious, ashamed, angry or worthless

CHECK YOUR SYMPTOMS — Use the anxiety, stress and depression Symptom Checker and find out if you need to seek medical help.

What causes low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem may stem from experiences in early childhood. If you didn’t fit in at school, had difficulty meeting your parents’ expectations or were neglected or abused, this can lead a person to have negative core beliefs about themselves. These are ingrained beliefs a person has about themselves. Teenagers, especially young girls, may be subject to unhelpful messages and ideals on social media and in the media generally, that lead them to believe that their worth is based on how they look or behave. This may lead to low self-esteem and negative thoughts about their self-worth. Performing poorly at school or being bullied can also cause low self-esteem. Stressful life events, such as an unhappy relationship, a bereavement or serious illness, may also cause low self-esteem.

What are the effects of low self-esteem?

If you have low self-esteem you may have difficulty with relationships and problems at work or school. You may become very upset by criticism or disapproval and withdraw from activities and people. You may avoid doing anything where you may be judged or measured against other people. Some people with low self-esteem stop looking after their appearance; others may over-compensate by always being perfectly groomed. You could also have problems with your body image, drink too much alcohol or take drugs and you might not stand up for yourself when you are bullied or abused. Teenagers with low self-esteem may use alcohol or drugs to feel better or to fit in, may have poor body image, and may have sexual activity earlier than their peers.

What health problems are associated with low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem may be associated with health problems such as depression and anxiety, eating disorders, social phobia, attention deficit disorder and substance abuse.

How to improve your self-esteem

To improve your self-esteem you can:

What is masculine energy in a man?
What is masculine energy in a man?

As reported by Living Well Counseling Services, masculine energy is about doing and being action-oriented. Masculine energy is stable and more...

Read More »
How do I stop being reactive with my partner?
How do I stop being reactive with my partner?

Some tips to support you to be less reactive Think about responding rather than reacting. This may involve reframing how you experience life. ......

Read More »

What age is the prime of life?

Crudely speaking, you may conclude that you are at your sexual peak in your 20s, your physical peak in your 30s, your mental peak in your 40s and 50s and at your happiest in your 60s – but these are just averages, so your own trajectories may follow very different paths.

If sitcoms and movies are to be believed, your 20s and 30s are something of an ongoing orgy. In fact, neither sexual desire, nor sexual activity, fall off very quickly until well into your 50s. And even then the decline is far from precipitous. According to one paper examining “sexually active life expectancy”, men who are 55 today can expect another 15 or so years of relatively frequent sex; women of that age can expect slightly more than a decade. Intercourse may not be quite as regular or vigorous as it once was, but according to that study, 30% of healthy people aged 65-74 still enjoy sex at least once a week. What’s more, the falling sex drive may have other compensations – just as your libido starts falling, your zest for life rises. This is something of a paradox, given the physical complaints that come with age, but it could be partly down to the fact that you have finally learnt to balance your emotions after the tumult of the previous decades.

Elixir of youth?

So what are we to take away from these findings? Crudely speaking, you may conclude that you are at your sexual peak in your 20s, your physical peak in your 30s, your mental peak in your 40s and 50s and at your happiest in your 60s – but these are just averages, so your own trajectories may follow very different paths. Perhaps more important is the general recognition that age brings its equal shares of ups and downs; there is no, overall, prime of your life.

Why do couples stop making love?
Why do couples stop making love?

Couples may stop having sex due to a lack of trust after an affair, exhaustion, boredom, and conflicting parenting styles, among other reasons....

Read More »
How do you know when a guy friend has feelings for you but is hiding it?
How do you know when a guy friend has feelings for you but is hiding it?

A guy who has feelings, but is intent on hiding them is likely to stare from a distance. He may be trying to avoid you. Or attempt to look in any...

Read More »
What to do on a 4th date?
What to do on a 4th date?

8 Things to Be Ready for on the Fourth Date A fun date! ... Feeling comfortable around each other. ... Being open. Defining what you guys are. ......

Read More »
How do you cut off a friend nicely?
How do you cut off a friend nicely?

Some options include telling the person directly that you are ending the friendship. Or, you might allow the friendship to fade away by...

Read More »