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What are the four signs of love?

It outlines five general ways that romantic partners express and experience love, which Chapman calls "love languages". They are acts of service, gift-giving, physical touch, quality time, and words of affirmation.

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1992 book by Gary Chapman

The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate is a 1992 book by Gary Chapman.[1] It outlines five general ways that romantic partners express and experience love, which Chapman calls "love languages". They are acts of service, gift-giving, physical touch, quality time, and words of affirmation.

Summary [ edit ]

According to Chapman, the five "love languages" are:

Examples are given from his counseling practice, as well as questions to help determine one's own love languages.[2][3] According to Chapman's theory, each person has one primary and one secondary love language. Chapman suggests that to discover another person's love language, one must observe the way they express love to others, and analyze what they complain about most often and what they request from their significant other most often. He theorizes that people tend to naturally give love in the way that they prefer to receive love, and better communication between couples can be accomplished when one can demonstrate caring to the other person in the love language the recipient understands. An example would be: if a husband's love language is acts of service, he may be confused when he does the laundry and his wife does not perceive that as an act of love, viewing it as simply performing household duties, because the love language she comprehends is words of affirmation (verbal affirmation that he loves her). She may try to use what she values, words of affirmation, to express her love to him, which he would not value as much as she does. If she understands his love language and mows the lawn for him, he perceives it in his love language as an act of expressing her love for him; likewise, if he tells her he loves her, she values that as an act of love.

Reception [ edit ]

The book sold 8,500 copies in its first year, four times what the publisher expected.[4] The following year it sold 17,000, and two years later, 137,000.[4] It was on the New York Times Best Seller list from 2009 to 2013.[5] A new, revised edition of The Five Love Languages was released on January 1, 2015.[citation needed] A 2006 study by Nicole Egbert and Denise Polk suggests that the Five Love Languages might have some degree of psychometric validity.[6]

Related works [ edit ]

Since 1992, Chapman has written several books related to The Five Love Languages, including The Five Love Languages of Children in 1997[7] and The Five Love Languages for Singles in 2004.[8] In 2011, Chapman co-authored The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace with Dr. Paul White, applying the 5 Love Languages concepts to work-based relationships.[9] There are also special editions of the book, such as The Five Love Languages Military Edition (2013) which Chapman co-authored with Jocelyn Green.[10]

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How do you make someone feel regret?

Bring up other things they've done wrong. Make it seem like this is a pattern of behavior you've come to expect, and certainly not one that you deserve. It's most effective if you bring up things that are similar to whatever you're trying to get the person to apologize for, but it can be anything that upset you.

This article was co-authored by wikiHow staff writer, Amy Bobinger . Amy Bobinger has been a writer and editor at wikiHow since 2017. She especially enjoys writing articles that help people overcome interpersonal hurdles but frequently covers a variety of subjects, including health and wellness, spirituality, gardening, and more. Amy graduated with a B.A. in English Lit from Mississippi College in 2011 and now lives in her hometown with her husband and two young sons. This article has been viewed 612,563 times.

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To give someone a guilt trip so they will apologize to you, start by asking them leading questions to get the person to admit what they did. You can also bring up similar past situations to make it seem like this is a pattern of behavior that you’ve come to expect from them. Then, tell the person that what they did makes you question the way you feel about them. If the person still isn't feeling guilty enough to apologize to you, kick the drama up a notch by crying, yelling, or making a scene. Don't forget to play on their emotions by using loaded words like "disappointed," "selfish," and “ashamed” to fuel their internal guilt! For tips on guilting someone into getting something you want, read on!

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