What are the 3 month rule in break-up?

boilingwaters.ph - 3 Month Rule - Boiling Waters

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Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Boiling Waters PH. As to where it originated and to whoever invented the idea(s), I don’t have any knowledge about that. But if you’re curious about what it means or implies, I may have a few say on the topic.

So what exactly is the three-month rule anyway?

As far as I know there are 2 types: After a Break-Up, and During Dating. While you are busy reading this article, try mo rin makinig sa episode namin:

Three-Month Rule: After a Break-Up

This one was introduced and oriented to me by my friends.

Basically, after a break-up, the three-month rule is a rule that says you and your ex are both given 3 months before entering the dating scene again. Just waiting it out, and mourning that your relationship ended. Just go on with your individual separate lives and see what happens. To some this may be just a short period of time, while it may mean otherwise to others. In any case, after the third month, if you BOTH find that you’re still in love with your exes, then you might consider trying to work it out again. If only one of you feels something and the other doesn’t, then it may no longer be worth a shot for a second chance. In addition, if you’re certain that you no longer feel anything towards your ex partner, then it’s the accepted time that you’re allowed to date again. Having this rule is more or less about mutual respect, and about the healing process for both parties. It’s a safe approach in ending a relationship I guess and to avoid that horrible feeling, for example you saw your boyfriend or girlfriend dating already the next day after a 5-year relationship. Because let’s face it, seeing your past love date someone after a few days or weeks from your break-up tears you into a million pieces.

So there. The first type of the Three-Month Rule.

Now, on to the next one.

Three-Month Rule: During Dating

Suppose you are dating someone right now, but you’ve only known the person recently. This three-month rule is to slap you from the mirage you might be experiencing. First impressions honestly, barely last. In reality, when you are attracted to someone whether physically, emotionally or whatsoever, your mind is being deceived that everything that the person does is cute, and you actually see them as the person you want them to be. So the three months is just an ample amount of time for you to see the person and yourself impartially. Is he/she is really that nice? What less desirable traits does he/she have? Do I really like this person? Are we compatible? Is sex all he/she’s after? Would I want this person to be a part of my life for months and years to come? Of course getting to know the person longer is ideal, but three months is just the right time to get you pass the honeymoon stage. When after all is said and done after those three months, it’s up to you on whether or not you want to continue entertaining the person or put a period on it early on.

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How effective is no contact?

The no-contact rule will not help you get your ex back Some people try to use the no-contact rule as a form of manipulation (i.e., a way to get your ex to miss you so much, they want you back). But despite what some people will tell you on the internet, no contact is not particularly effective for getting an ex back.

mindbodygreen.com - The No-Contact Rule: The Most Effective Way To Move On From An ...

Some people try to use the no-contact rule as a form of manipulation (i.e., a way to get your ex to miss you so much, they want you back). But despite what some people will tell you on the internet, no contact is not particularly effective for getting an ex back. Just because some people have exes who reached out to them after a period of no contact doesn't mean this will be the case for everyone. Moreover, trying to reduce your former partner to a formula or trying to control their behavior to meet your own needs is not very empathetic. Attempting to use the no-contact rule this way may be a sign that you have your own inner work to do that's a barrier to your relationship working. This strategy can also be unhealthy for you because it keeps you psychologically attached to a past relationship, slowing down your healing process. Instead, the no-contact rule should be about you and helping yourself move on from your ex. It's an integral tool of self-empowerment. You want to get to the place where you're able to say, "With or without you, my life is going to be amazing."

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