What are the 3 main pillars of a healthy relationship?

Whereas a caregiver relationship may include commitment and intimacy, and a casual fling may include passion and even sometimes intimacy, a successful, thriving, and healthy romantic relationship typically involves the regular practice of commitment, intimacy, and passion.

couplestherapymelbourne.com.au - Top 3 Necessary Relationship Pillars - Couples Therapy Melbourne

How many dates before you stop seeing other people?

Other ambiguities the survey has cleared up for us: You should stop seeing other people after six dates, and it's okay to start throwing...

Last updated May 23, 2021

When should I give up on him?

15 Signs It's Time to Give Up On Him and Move On He doesn't respect you (and his behavior shows it). ... You can't count on him. ... You're always...

Last updated Nov 18, 2021

Promotion

Top 3 Necessary Relationship Pillars

By: Elizabeth Landau, Provisional Psychologist & Associate MFT

The Triangular Theory of Love was developed by Professor Robert Sternberg, and American Psychologist who distilled down the top three necessary pillars that any healthy relationship should have. What are they?

According to Sternberg, the top 3 most important relationship qualities that couples need to remember to cultivate for keeping a relationship thriving, and not just surviving, are:

Commitment

Intimacy

Passion

Commitment, in whatever arrangement (monogamous, polyamorous, etc.) feels truthful to you, means maintaining the trust you place in each other to uphold that relationship bond. This pillar is considered a conscious decision that couples or partnerships make to stick to together, whereas intimacy and passion are more like felt senses of closeness (intimacy) and excitement (passion). Intimacy, as culturally appropriate, means connecting (or attaching) with each other on a deeper level than you would a friend or a colleague, which could include sharing aspects of your emotional and cognitive (thinking) life, developing interest in each other’s interests, or dividing responsibilities to ease the many tasks of life. Finally, passion, in a consenting agreement, involves whatever physical, sensual, emotional, or spiritual activities that bring the “spark” to your relationship. Whereas a caregiver relationship may include commitment and intimacy, and a casual fling may include passion and even sometimes intimacy, a successful, thriving, and healthy romantic relationship typically involves the regular practice of commitment, intimacy, and passion. This theory has been tested in research settings and explored by psychologists and data scientists since its introduction in 1997, and tends to support the theory that the presence of these 3 pillars is generally a good indicator of a healthy, thriving relationship.

Does your relationship have all three?

For more information on the Triangular Theory of Love, check out the research articles and book references below: Sternberg, Robert J. (1997). Construct validation of a triangular love scale. European Journal of Social Psychology, 27(3), 313–335. Sternberg, Robert J. (2004). A Triangular Theory of Love. In Reis, H. T.; Rusbult, C. E. Close Relationships. New York: Psychology Press. ISBN 978-0863775956 . Sternberg, Robert J. (2007). Triangulating Love. In Oord, T. J. The Altruism Reader: Selections from Writings on Love, Religion, and Science. West Conshohocken, PA: Templeton Foundation. ISBN 9781599471273 .

Image Credit: Rafy [Wikipedia Public domain]

How do I make myself unforgettable to a guy?

Consistency is one of the biggest things that makes a woman memorable to a man. If you check up on him daily and converse with him when he reaches...

Last updated May 18, 2022

How often should you talk on the phone in a LDR?

In a long-distance relationship, you should go often enough to feel connected but not too much so your conversations don't get boring. Some long-...

Last updated Jun 26, 2019

Promotion

Is saying I love you 3 months in too early?

According to 2020 OKCupid data on 6,000 people shared with mindbodygreen, 62% of people think you should say "I love you" "as soon as you feel it," whereas 22% think you should wait "several months," and 3% think you should wait "at least a year." On average, research has found men take about three months to say "I ...

mindbodygreen.com - When Is The Right Time To Say ""I Love You"" In A New Relationship?

In general, if two people love each other, it doesn't matter who says "I love you" first. If you're not sure whether your partner feels the same way you do, you can still tell them how you feel—just be mindful of why you're doing it. If you just want to let them know where your heart is at and don't mind whether or not your feelings are reciprocated, go for it. "There is so much taboo around what 'I love you' means and who we say it to," Brown-James says. "I suggest taking a bit of time to inventory your feelings. Honoring your feelings of vulnerability is risky and can be scary. It is, however, a way to build intimacy." That said, Manly points out that those three little words can carry a lot of weight for some people, so it's worth considering how your confession might affect them and your relationship. "A person's proclamation of love can bring a 'not-so-ready' person closer, yet it can also scare someone away," she says. If it's important for you to have the other person love you back, Manly recommends paying attention to body language cues as well as the other types of language they use to describe how they feel about you. "Couples often test each other out by paying attention to key phrases such as 'I'm catching feelings for you,' 'I really like you,' or 'I feel so close to you,'" she says. "Notice if these precursors to 'I love you' are in play. If they are, it may be the right time to voice how you feel."

What does Galatians 3 1 14 mean?

The Scripture foresaw that the Gentiles would come to faith in Christ, and Abraham became their father. The blessing of God is not found in...

Last updated Mar 21, 2021

How do you win a man heart?

5 Ways to Win a Man's Heart Notice what he does and compliment him. When men do things around the house there are two purposes: one is to fix the...

Last updated May 13, 2020

Promotion

Which things keep relationship strong?

Here's 8 ways to keep your relationship going strong. Have an honest and open line of communication. ... Embrace your individuality. ... Celebrate...

Last updated Dec 19, 2021

Promotion

Do relationships that move too fast last?

While it's normal to want to feel close to someone you're dating, moving too fast can be a recipe for disaster. These relationships often fail...

Last updated Feb 8, 2019