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What are some toxic boundaries?

Here are some examples of what unhealthy boundaries may look like: Disrespecting the values, beliefs, and opinions of others when you do not agree with them. Not saying “no” or not accepting when others say “no.” Feeling like you are responsible for other people's feelings and/or happiness. More items... •

healthyrelationshipsinitiative.org - Healthy vs. Unhealthy Boundaries
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By Eleanor Beeslaar

What exactly do healthy boundaries look like?

Healthy boundaries are a key element in your physical, mental, and emotional health. They look different for each person and relationship, and they may change over time. Healthy boundaries are also bidirectional; they involve communicating your wants and needs in a relationship, while also respecting the wants and needs of the other person in the relationship. Boundaries can be both physical and emotional. Physical boundaries involve what you are comfortable with regarding personal space, touch, privacy, and sexual contact. Emotional boundaries, on the other hand, encompass the line between your feelings and the feelings of others. This looks like taking responsibility for your own feelings and recognizing that you cannot control what others feel. It also involves being aware of what you do/do not feel comfortable sharing with others and honoring those limits. Here are just a few examples of what healthy boundaries might look like:

Valuing your personal boundaries and not compromising them for someone else.

Saying “no” and accepting when others say “no.”

Knowing who you are and what you want, and communicating that to others.

Engaging in appropriate sharing.

Not letting others define you or your sense of self-worth.

Knowing that your needs and feelings are just as important as the needs and feelings of others.

Knowing that you have the right to your emotions and feelings.

Respecting others’ values, beliefs, and opinions, while knowing that you do not have to compromise your own values, beliefs, and opinions. Regardless of what type of boundaries you are talking about, it’s important to keep in mind that healthy boundaries are all about you and the other person in the relationship’s wants, needs, and limits being honored and respected. It’s also important to remember that healthy boundaries take effort and intentionality to implement and maintain. Healthy boundaries can also help prevent relationship abuse by helping individuals understand the difference between what is acceptable vs. unacceptable behavior in different types of relationships.

What do unhealthy boundaries look like?

Now that we have a better understanding of what healthy boundaries look like, let’s talk about unhealthy boundaries. Unhealthy boundaries involve a disregard for your own and others’ values, wants, needs, and limits. They can also lead to potentially abusive dating/romantic relationships and increase the chances of other types of abusive relationships as well.

Here are some examples of what unhealthy boundaries may look like:

Disrespecting the values, beliefs, and opinions of others when you do not agree with them.

Not saying “no” or not accepting when others say “no.”

Feeling like you are responsible for other people’s feelings and/or happiness.

Feeling like you are responsible for “fixing” or “saving” others.

Touching people without their permission.

Engaging in sexual activity without clear consent from the other person.

We hope that today’s blog has helped you gain a better understanding of what healthy vs. unhealthy boundaries look like. We encourage you to keep this information in mind as you set boundaries in your relationships! We will also be sharing more about how to set healthy boundaries in your relationships in tomorrow’s blog, so be sure to stay tuned!

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How to make her go crazy in love with you?

Make her feel special. If you want a girl to go crazy for you, then you have to make her feel special by actually taking the time to recognize her as a unique individual. Tell her, “You're not like other girls…” or “You're so different from your friends…” and make her see that she really does stand out to you.

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This doesn’t mean that you have to play elaborate games to win the girl over. It does mean that you should keep things interesting so there’s never a dull moment when she sees you. If you put it all out there, she’ll be less likely to be crazy about the intriguing, awesome guy that you are. Though you want to win the girl over, you have to keep up the chase. You don’t want her to think that she has you in the palm of her hand, but that she has to do some work to win you over, too. It should be a mutual thing. Let her know you like her, but don’t shower her with compliments. Hang out with her, but make sure you have plans with other friends, too, and that you aren’t available the second she wants to hang out. If she calls you, stop picking up the second the phone rings; you’ve got other things to do, right? This will keep the girl interested in coming back for more.

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