Infatuation Rules
Photo: Gustavo Fring
12 and a half According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, kids start dating at an average age of 12 and a half for girls and 13 and a half for boys. Every teen — or preteen — is different, though, and your child might be ready sooner or later than their peers.
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Read More »Teenage dating can be confusing for parents. Your child might not even wait for the teenage years before they ask you if they can “go out” with someone. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, kids start dating at an average age of 12 and a half for girls and 13 and a half for boys. Every teen — or preteen — is different, though, and your child might be ready sooner or later than their peers. Talking to Your Teen About Dating If your child has started to bring up dating, start by figuring out what they mean by “dating.” When a 12- or 13-year-old talks about a budding relationship with someone, they might mean anything from texting back and forth with a crush to a group movie outing including the crush and other friends. Younger teens are more likely to date in a cluster, rather than one-on-one. It’s part of the natural transition from same-gender social groups to coed groups and finally to one-on-one dating. Co-ed groups let kids experiment with dating behaviors in a safer setting with less pressure. Talk to your teen or preteen about what dating or going out entails in their friend group. You need to know what they want to do before you decide whether you’re comfortable with it. When Is Your Teen Ready to Date “Solo”? Eventually, teens are ready to make the move and start going on what an adult would recognize as a date. Some pediatricians suggest that kids wait until they’re 16 to start this kind of one-on-one dating. That’s a good place to start the discussion, but every kid is different. Some are more emotionally mature than others. Some teens come from communities and families where one-on-one dating starts earlier or later. The best thing is to talk about one-on-one dating before it becomes a possibility. If your 13-year-old is “hanging out” with someone — teen talk for casual dating without a commitment — it’s not too early to start talking about dating rules.
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