Infatuation Rules
Infatuation Rules
Photo: Leeloo Thefirst
Absolutely. Dating experts agree that a premature profession of love, while not necessarily a dealbreaker, is definitely a red flag. If someone is capable of falling in love that easily, they're just as capable of falling out [source: Georgi].
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Read More »" " This might be a lovely present after several months of dating. After a couple of weeks, though? Not so much. Jan Tyler/ Getty Images It's your third date with Zac and things are going great. You're amazed at how many things you have in common: food, music, even your favorite cartoon as a kid. You've only known each other for two weeks, but you find yourself thinking about him a lot, almost as much as he texts you (a little annoying, but you're sure he'll calm down). Unlike some of the other guys you've dated lately, you can really see a future with Zac, as long as this "living with his parents" thing is just a phase and he stops calling everything "the bomb dot com." After dinner at Arby's -- oops, he forgot his wallet again! -- he pulls out a paper rose and says, "Baby, I know it's crazy, but I think I love you." Crazy? Perhaps. Too soon? Absolutely. Dating experts agree that a premature profession of love, while not necessarily a dealbreaker, is definitely a red flag. If someone is capable of falling in love that easily, they're just as capable of falling out [source: Georgi]. Or worse, the love-struck party might just be faking it in order to win his or her way into the heart (and bedroom) of a new love. Of course, the way you react to an early "I love you" depends a lot on your own feelings. If you really like the other person and enjoy spending time with him or her, then you should be more forgiving of an early blurt. In this case, the offender probably confused the giddy infatuation of "falling in love" for "being in love" [source: Atwood]. If you want to salvage the relationship, the best way to react is to be honest. "I really like you, too," you might say. "But I think we still need to get to know each other better before we can talk about 'love.'" Unfortunately, an early "I love you" can do irreparable damage to the natural balance of a young relationship [source: Rollins]. If you've barely entered the "really like" phase and your partner is already picking out your wedding colors, it's going to put a lot of pressure on you to figure out -- quickly -- if you feel the same way. The L-word is now the elephant in the room. If you think there's a future in the relationship, address the issue sensitively and do your best to restore the balance. If not, Hallmark makes some lovely "you're dumped" cards. For more articles and advice on love and relationships, follow the links on the next page.
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Read More »The no-contact rule will not help you get your ex back But despite what some people will tell you on the internet, no contact is not particularly effective for getting an ex back. Just because some people have exes who reached out to them after a period of no contact doesn't mean this will be the case for everyone.
Some people try to use the no-contact rule as a form of manipulation (i.e., a way to get your ex to miss you so much, they want you back). But despite what some people will tell you on the internet, no contact is not particularly effective for getting an ex back. Just because some people have exes who reached out to them after a period of no contact doesn't mean this will be the case for everyone. Moreover, trying to reduce your former partner to a formula or trying to control their behavior to meet your own needs is not very empathetic. Attempting to use the no-contact rule this way may be a sign that you have your own inner work to do that's a barrier to your relationship working. This strategy can also be unhealthy for you because it keeps you psychologically attached to a past relationship, slowing down your healing process. Instead, the no-contact rule should be about you and helping yourself move on from your ex. It's an integral tool of self-empowerment. You want to get to the place where you're able to say, "With or without you, my life is going to be amazing."
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