How to resolve conflict?

Some Ways to Resolve Conflicts Talk directly. Assuming that there is no threat of physical violence, talk directly to the person with whom you have the problem. ... Choose a good time. ... Plan ahead. ... Don't blame or name-call. ... Give information. ... Listen. ... Show that you are listening. ... Talk it all through. More items...

clackamas.us - Some Ways to Resolve Conflicts | Clackamas County

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Talk directly

Assuming that there is no threat of physical violence, talk directly to the person with whom you have the problem. Direct conversation is much more effective than sending a letter, banging on the wall, throwing a rock or complaining to everyone else.

Choose a good time

Plan ahead and allow yourselves enough time for a thorough discussion. Don't start talking about the conflict just as the other person is leaving to make dinner, for example. Try to talk in a quiet place where you can both be comfortable and undisturbed for as long as the discussion takes.

Plan ahead

Think about what you want to say ahead of time. Explain what the problem is and how it affects you.

Don't blame or name-call

Antagonizing the other person only makes it harder for him or her to hear you and understand your concerns. Don't blame the other person for everything or begin the conversation with your opinion of what should be done.

Give information

Don't interpret the other person's behavior. "You are blocking my driveway on purpose just to make me mad!" Instead, give information about your own feelings: "When your car blocks my driveway, I get angry because I can't get to work on time."

Listen

Give the other person a chance to tell his or her side of the conflict completely. Relax and listen; try to learn how the other person feels.

Show that you are listening

Although you may not agree with what is being said, tell the other person that you hear him or her and are glad that you are discussing the problem together.

Talk it all through

Once you start, get all of the issues and feelings out into the open. Don't leave out the part that seems too "difficult" to discuss or too "insignificant" to be important. Your solutions will work best if all issues are discussed thoroughly.

Work on a solution

When you have reached this point in the discussion, start working on a solution. Two or more people cooperating are much more effective than one person telling another to change. Be specific: "I will turn my music off at midnight" is better than a vague "I won't play my music anymore."

Follow through

Agree to check with each other at specific times to make sure that the agreement is still working... then really do it! Contact Clackamas County Dispute Resolution Center if you are unable to resolve the problem yourself or if you need assistance to contact the other party.

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How do I attract a silent guy?

Smile and hold eye contact from across a room. If you don't know the shy guy you're interested in, start to catch his attention with subtle moves. Try smiling at him during class or over lunch, and make eye contact for 2 or 3 seconds before looking away.

wikihow.com - How to Get a Shy Guy: 10 Steps (with Pictures) - wikiHow

This article was co-authored by Sarah Schewitz, PsyD . Sarah Schewitz, Psy.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist by the California Board of Psychology with over 10 years of experience. She received her Psy.D. from the Florida Institute of Technology in 2011. She is the founder of Couples Learn, an online psychology practice helping couples and individuals improve and change their patterns in love and relationships. This article has been viewed 693,229 times.

Article Summary

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If you have a crush on a shy guy, don’t wait for him to ask you out or make a move. Instead, catch his attention by smiling at him during class or making eye contact with him during lunchtime. To strike up a conversation with your shy guy, try some casual comments about class or vaction plans. When you’re talking to him, give him a light touch on the arm or a pat on the shoulder every so often to hint at your romantic interest. As you become more comfortable together, ask for his number by saying something like “Hey, I’ve liked talking to you for the last few weeks. It would be fun if we could talk more. Could I get your number?” Then, try to text or call him a few times a week to let him know you’re interested in being more than casual friends. To learn how to ask a shy guy out, keep reading!

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