Infatuation Rules
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How to Overcome Insecurity

Like other psychological conditions, you can become less insecure with some lifestyle changes and shifts in perspective, which a therapist can help you achieve if you’re struggling on your own. Changing your patterns takes time and patience, so you should be willing to maintain interventions over the long-term to see lasting results.

Here are 11 ways to deal with insecurity:4,5,6

1. Talk to a Therapist

You wouldn’t try to set your broken bone or remove your gallbladder, so don’t try to resolve your insecurities if they require professional care. Therapists can provide the most effective and efficient form of treatments to establish long periods of well-being and security. Finding a therapist may seem daunting, but the process is quite simple. You can check in with your insurance company, call your primary care doctor, or ask a friend for treatment recommendations. Or, consider using an online therapist directory where you can search by location, specialty, and insurance coverage.

2. Acknowledge the Role of Insecurity in Daily Life

With insecurity, it can feel that the problem is only there part of the time or that it does not affect your life in any significant ways. These views could be true, but it is invaluable to take an honest look at your life and ask yourself how insecurity influences your school, work, trust, communication, self-esteem, and mental health. When people are insecure, it can feel like outside issues, situations, and people are causing the problems. Surely outside forces play a role in insecurity, but it is up to the individual to address the problem. As insecurity rises from past life experiences, mental health issues, or current relationships, be sure to plan interventions that target the source.

4. Practice Unconditional Self-Compassion

When insecurity is the issue, you’ll need tremendous amounts of compassion and self-love. Rather than seeking these out from others, you will create more change by giving them to yourself. Loving yourself creates more security within yourself.

5. Reparent Yourself

Many early lessons and examples your parents gave you could contribute to insecurity. Take a long look at your beliefs about yourself, other people, and the world around you to teach yourself new views. Through this process, you can establish security and self-worth.

6. Openly Communicate Your Insecurity Concerns

Insecurity makes people unsure and uncertain about relationships, so then they don’t feel comfortable enough to share their experiences and feelings with others, but this approach only breeds isolation and shame. A lack of communication can harm your relationship, so take the opposite approach by being open with trusted supporters about what you endure and what they can do to help. Be sure to keep your expectations realistic. Express your insecurity to your loved ones, mental health provider, and physical health provider.

7. Build a Strong Support Network

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You will always need a strong group of people in your corner. Having healthy, happy friends and loved ones around you will help to further shift your perspectives from the views you’ve held. They can expose you to new places, people, and experiences that build your confidence as well.

8. Focus on the Positives

The way you talk to yourself and the way you see the world will have a major impact on your insecurities. People who speak to themselves more positively, challenge their negative self-talk, stay focused on the future, and find good things in the world around them tend to be more secure and comfortable. These may feel like foreign concepts initially, but they pay off in the long term.

9. Take Care of Your Physical Health

Exercising, getting good sleep, and eating healthier foods will help lower mental health symptoms and improve self-esteem. When people are physically healthier, they tend to be mentally healthier, so start with small changes and build consistency over time.

10. Accept Your Limitations & Celebrate Your Differences

Change is good, and moving in new directions can help people accomplish great things. The problems arise when people become fixated on changing the unchangeable. Accept what you cannot change and find peace with your insecurities. Find ways to embrace what makes you uncomfortable.

11. Aim for Progress, Not Perfection

Feeling perfectly secure at all times is not possible. There is no such state as perfection, so aim for progress. Look at where you’ve come from, where you are, and where you’re going. Appreciate your path and stay committed to change.

Final Thoughts on Insecurity

Insecurity is a universal experience, but not all people experience insecurity so intensely that it disrupts their life and ability to function. If insecurity is creating unwanted impacts in your mental, social, or physical health, it could be time to take action and address the issue with professional support and assistance.

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