Infatuation Rules
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How do you find out if a guy likes you without being obvious?

They're often in touch with you They'll find a reason to text you, whether it's to tell a joke, make plans, or even just send a bunch of emojis. When someone likes you, your presence is always welcome. If you're not around, they'll still try to get a hold of you.

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More often than not, full-grown adults turn into teenagers when they have a crush. We get friends to bring it up to them, go out in group settings, and use flirty texts in a joking way. But you can avoid all of these games simply by learning how to tell if someone likes you. The truth is that finding out if someone likes you is pretty straightforward if you know how. You don’t have to ask at all. You can just tell. Hiding your attraction to someone is really hard, if not impossible. Even if you don’t say much, the other signs will give you away. The things you do and say around the person you like will be done with careful consideration of their presence. [Read: How to know if YOU like someone – 30 things you should be feeling right now]

The confusion of dating

That confusing time when you realize that you actually really like a person that you’re talking to is both exciting and downright terrifying. You wonder if they like you back because they’re not asking you out, and you’re not completely familiar with the psychological signs that someone likes you, so you can’t decode their intentions. It’s very easy to listen to words and not really focus on the things people are doing. The problem with that is that people lie. People say things to make others feel better, even if they aren’t true. You would be far better off not listening to words. Instead, look more toward the things they can’t help – their physiological signs.

Why do you want to know the signs that someone likes you?

That might sound like a very obvious question, but it’s important to decode your intentions before you go opening a can of worms that you can’t put the lid back on.

Do you like this person? If not, why do you care whether or not they like you romantically?

However, if you do like them, you have to be prepared for the possibility that you won’t get the outcome you desire. We don’t want to be negative, but we don’t want you to be disappointed if it doesn’t work out. Of course, we hope that you do get the answer you want. In that case, you have to be serious about moving things forward. Otherwise, you’re just going to be stranded in awkward land. [Read: 28 secret signs to tell if a girl likes you, even if she’s playing it cool]

Obvious signs that someone likes you without asking them directly

If you really want to know if they’re digging you as much as you’re digging them, it’s time to get medical. Physiological signs are things that you just can’t help – the things you do instinctively without trying. These are your instincts, and you can’t avoid them in certain situations. For example, when you’re in a situation that scares you, you’re going to automatically react in a certain way. You’re probably going to become nervous, your heart will race, you might get hot or start shaking, etc. This is a survival mechanism, and it has evolved from the days of the rather hairy cavepeople. The same can be said for attraction. When we like something or someone, we automatically show physiological signs of attraction. [Read: How to tell if a guy likes you – 75 signs to instantly know for sure] How can you tell if someone wants you? You just have to watch out for a few of these small signs, some or which are physiological and some simply behavioral.

1. They gravitate toward you

Even in a group setting, they’ll gravitate toward you. Think of it this way – when you go out, and there’s a mixture of people present, you end up hanging out with people you already know and like. The same goes for attraction. You’re going to gravitate toward that person because you want to spend time with them. [Read: 15 obvious signs of flirting between a guy and a girl]

2. They show signs of nervousness for no specific reason

The best way to learn how to tell if someone likes you is by whether or not they generally seem nervous. When they talk to you, they may seem shy or awkward. This is not always the case, but if the person gets shy around you, it means you make them nervous in a good way. They may be trying too hard to not mess anything up, or they may be wondering what to say. They want to get the conversation going because they want to leave a lasting impression on you. 3. They don’t want to be made fun of in front of you When someone jokes about them around you, they’ll try to derail the friend making the comments. No one wants to be made fun of in front of someone that they’re attracted to, even if it is just a joke. If someone doesn’t legitimately get upset but jokingly tries to stop the conversation from continuing, then they’re clearly trying to stop their friend from putting them in an awkward position in front of you. [Read: What are cock blocks, and why do they do it?]

4. They’re often in touch with you

They’ll find a reason to text you, whether it’s to tell a joke, make plans, or even just send a bunch of emojis. When someone likes you, your presence is always welcome. If you’re not around, they’ll still try to get a hold of you. Even if it isn’t something important, they’ll make up a reason just to talk to you.

5. They show a keen interest in you

Rather than asking simple questions as anyone else would, they’ll actually try to get to know you more. AKA the fake date. They will legitimately invite you out, even if it’s not an actual date at first. It could be them inviting you out to a movie with their friends or to eat out at a casual place *not a date place*. It could even be them meeting you somewhere, like a local bookstore that one of you loves. None of this classifies a date, but they’re feeling out whether or not there’s chemistry and working their way to asking you out without being obvious that they’re making the first move. This is one of the major points on how to tell if someone likes you. [Read: Is it a date, or are the two of you just hanging out?]

7. Goody two shoes

They will always be on their best behavior around you. This means that all the usual obnoxious jokes and commentary they might say on a regular basis will be toned down around you if not completely avoided. It isn’t them lying about who they are. It’s just a natural response to someone you’re attracted to. Everyone wants to shine in a good light. The skeletons will come out of the closet eventually, but it’s a surefire sign to watch for!

8. There’s a slight split personality going on

It will seem like they’re more open around other people than they are with you. It sounds contradictory, but if they seem more open around other people, they obviously don’t care what these people think of them, or they already know these other people. Meanwhile, things are a bit different with you. When someone has feelings for you, they care what you have to say because they’re attracted to you, so they’ll be on their best behavior. [Read: 27 signs to know if he likes you as more than a friend and wants to date you]

9. They notice and do the little things

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They will go out of their way to do nice things for you, even if they’re small things. For instance, they’ll offer to buy you a drink if you’re hanging out, or they’ll make you something. Maybe they’ll help you set up for an event if you’re planning one. Even something as simple as holding a door open can mean so much more coming from someone who’s attracted to you. They might just be really helpful and polite, but it’s also how to tell if someone likes you. [Read: How to show your appreciation to someone and express your gratitude]

10. They’re clearly in the infatuation stage

This is also the most reliable they will ever be, so enjoy it. Not to be negative, but anyone you date might let you down at some point. No one is perfect, and your expectations might be a little too high sometimes, setting the stage for disappointment. You’ll both be more reliable during the time before you date throughout the first 6 months of dating. This person who likes you will go out of their way to be there for you, talk to you, spend time with you, and help you when you need it. [Read: The talking stage – what it is and how to progress to the next one]

11. There’s plenty of touchy-feely flirting going on

It may happen right in the beginning or build up to it, but there will be a ton of flirting at some point. Some people are great at flirting right from the start and can pull it off in a non-creepy, non-sleazy way. Others want to get to know you first and make sure that you like them back before they flirt. Either way, flirting is a dead giveaway that they’ve at least considered your chemistry together, and they’re interested to see where it goes. It could be flirting over text, in person, over the phone, or all of the above.

12. They’re on a mission to impress you

One way or another, they will try to impress you. This tends to be a masculine thing, but women want to impress guys, too. If someone is telling you about their career path and what they’ve accomplished, they’re trying to impress you. They might make a really good drink or bake a really nice cake, or they might show off their intelligence and general knowledge about a variety of topics. This is certainly up there on the list of how to tell someone likes you. [Read: How to impress your crush]

13. They seek to bond over common ground

You will bond over common ground. It could be music, books, movies, video games, or your love of spaghetti and meatballs. Your common ground can literally be anything as long as you’re both passionate about it.

14. They notice everything

Even if they’re the quiet type, they will still laugh at your antics and sit somewhere close to you at social events. If a person is interested in you but they’re really quiet, the chances are that they’ll make up for it by sitting somewhere near you to observe your dynamic. They’ll notice everything about you and what’s going on because they’re so invested in the moment. They also take note of your likes and dislikes because they genuinely want to get to know you better. [Read: How to be better at dating]

15. Listen to the nosey people

Someone will usually point out this person’s behavior, wanting to know what your stance is on the whole situation. Basically, they’re being nosey! Then again, the best way to know if someone likes you or not is to just wait for someone else to point it out. It always happens! People notice when there’s a special dynamic forming on the horizon. [Read: Girly things – what your girlfriend’s really gossiping about]

16. They smile a lot around you

It’s hard to frown and be sad around someone you really like. When you’re attracted to someone, you’re automatically going to smile because you feel joy, and your face simply can’t help itself! In terms of how to tell if someone actually likes you, a constant smile is a pretty good measure. Eye contact is a definite sign of attraction. If you notice that the person you’ve got your eye on literally has their eye on you *especially when they think you’re not looking*, you can put it down as a definite. [Read: The best subtle eye contact flirting moves that always works]

18. They can’t look at you

Confusing, right? Some people are naturally a little shy, or they might suddenly become shy around the person they like. If you notice that they look at you and then quickly look away like they’ve been caught doing something they shouldn’t, it’s a good way to tell if someone likes you!

19. They display open body language

Yet another completely confusing contradiction is the subject of body language. Generally speaking, if you want to know if someone likes you and wants you to know about it, pay attention to their body language. It will be open and not at all defensive. This means that their arms will be by their sides instead of over their body. They’ll push their shoulders back instead of having them hunched up from stress. They’ll also keep the trunk of their body open and exposed. They generally look quite relaxed around you. [Read: 15 body language cues a girl gives away if she likes you] On the flip side, some people might actually display very closed body language around you for no real reason. This means they may cross their arms over their body. One of the best ways to figure it out is to see if they do the same thing with anyone else. That should give you your answer. [Read: How to tell if a shy girl likes you – 22 signs and ways to open her up]

20. Their body is angled toward you

We tend to unknowingly lean towards the things we like, so if you notice that his or her body is angled towards you rather than away from you, it’s a pretty clear sign they may really be into you. Even if someone is showing closed body language out of shyness, they will probably still lean into you a little. This won’t be a move that looks forced. It will also be quite subtle, but it’s definitely there. [Read: 18 signs to decode a guy’s body language and read his feelings]

21. Their cheeks are flushed

One of the clearest ways how to tell if someone likes you is if they have flushed cheeks. It’s not particularly hot, but they’re certainly going a little pink! The reason for this is thought to be the release of adrenaline, which causes an increase in blood flow. As a result, you get that pink tinge on your cheeks!

22. They might be shaking slightly

Isn’t it great when your mere presence causes someone to lose all control and start shaking a little?

23. They stumble over their words

If someone is stumbling over their words around you and they normally don’t have an issue with it, it’s a clear sign that either you terrify them or they like you! Hopefully, it’s the latter, but it’s a good indicator of whether or not someone’s crushing.

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24. They fidget a lot

One of the most common signs that someone likes you is that they’re fidgeting. This can be messing with their hair, touching their neck, tugging on their lip, or pulling on their sleeves. It can basically be any type of fidgeting motion that they wouldn’t normally do. [Read: How not to be nervous – 18 calm ways to eliminate nerves instantly]

25. Their pupils dilate

You’re going to have to look pretty closely to see if this is happening, but when we like someone, our pupils get larger in size.

26. They mirror your posture

When we are talking to someone we like, we tend to mirror their posture and movements to a small degree.

27. They have a strong posture

This is more likely to be a man, but it can sometimes be a woman, too. In this case, the posture is strong because they’re trying to impress you with their strength and confidence.

28. Their heart is beating faster

This is pretty difficult to identify unless you get very close, but if someone likes you, their heart is likely to beat a little faster when you’re around. Look at their neck if you get the chance. Can you visibly see their pulse? You might also notice that they’re a little breathless. [Read: Body language and attraction – how it works and how to recognize it]

29. They might be a little hot or sweaty

30. They’re instinctively protective of you

Exhibiting protective behavior can be observed in someone who likes you because we tend to want to protect those whom we care about. This could be sticking up for you verbally, whether you’re around or not, or it could be stepping into a fight. Either way, it’s a good sign. [Read: How to ask someone if they like you without embarrassing yourself]

31. You feel it

We’re all about intuition. You should never ignore what your body is trying to tell you. If there’s something inside of you saying, “this person likes me,” you’re probably right. At the same time, if your body is saying, “this person is creepy,” then you’re also right. Don’t deny your feelings.

32. They get rid of the barriers

If you’re sitting together for lunch, they’re going to try to remove any obstacles between you. Whether it’s the salt and pepper shakers or a cup, they’re going to make an open space. Someone who likes you will find ways to get rid of the barriers because they want to fully see you. If they don’t do this, however, it doesn’t mean that they only like you as a friend. It just means you haven’t built a bond yet. [Read: Signs of strong physical attraction that reveal a mad attraction]

33. They always laugh at your jokes

When you have a crush on someone, you tend to laugh at their jokes, right?

When someone likes you, they’ll always laugh at jokes, and it’s likely that some of your jokes aren’t even funny! If they’re not laughing at your jokes, it shows you that they didn’t like the joke. If they’re into you, they don’t want you to think that.

34. Watch their feet

This isn’t about having a foot fetish. This may sound a little weird, but if someone likes you, their feet will point in your direction. It’s a subtle sign, but body language is a huge indicator of how someone feels about you.

35. They drunk dial you

Have you received a drunk dial from them?

If they’re calling or texting you after a couple of drinks, we think it’s safe to say that you’re on their mind. You know the saying, “a drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts.”

36. They’re all over your social media

They’re all over whatever you post. Social media isn’t just for communication. You can also use it as a way to see who’s watching you *in a non-creepy way*. If they’re commenting on your posts and sending you private messages, they like you.

37. Their friends like you

Obviously, their friends know about you. This is something that you should pay attention to if you want to know how to tell if someone likes you. If they’re cracking jokes about the two of you or letting you into their circle, it’s a good sign that they’ve given the thumbs up, and they approve of you. [Read: These intense signs of chemistry reveal an instant connection]

Putting the signs into context

We know that you’re keen to get a positive answer when learning how to tell if someone likes you, but you do need to be a little cautious. Some signs might be out of context and not about crushing at all. For instance, if someone laughs at one of your jokes, it might simply mean that they found it funny. If they’re showing the signs discussed but only one or two of them, it could simply be them being friendly. You have to look at the whole picture and get a full interpretation of the situation. It’s very easy to try and make a situation into something simply because you want it to be that way. Basically, you want to have a handful of signs over a period of time. That should give you a general indication of whether or not they’re crushing in your direction. [Read: 28 signs he wants to make a move and is getting ready to ask you out]

They like you, so now what?

So, let’s assume it’s a big ‘yes’ to them liking you even when they don’t tell you directly. Now what?

If you’re sure that they like you and you like them, you need to make a move. That doesn’t mean literally jumping on them or telling them your feelings straight out. It means upping your flirting game and making it pretty obvious that you feel the same way. You could start suggesting you both meet up a little more frequently. When you do, try a few flirty touches or remarks. They should start to pick up on your signals, and hopefully, they’ll react in kind. At some point, one of you is going to have to just bite the bullet and go for it.

How many signs can you identify?

Remember that just one or two signs don’t really tell you a huge amount, but more than a handful could give you a very clear answer! Asking if they like you directly may lead to some awkwardness. Thankfully, we have these signs to fall back on! After all, when someone likes you, they can’t hide it. They’re programmed to do something about it, even if they only show tiny hints. The next time you need to know how to tell if someone likes you, look out for the signs! If you like them back, don’t question it. Just go with the flow, and watch your story develop naturally.

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