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How do I stop thinking about someone who is unavailable?

Here are 14 tips for how to stop thinking about someone: Don't Make Contact. Many times, people want to “remain friends” after a breakup. ... Stop Looking at Their Social Media. ... Turn to Your Support System. ... Focus on Self-Acceptance. ... Love Yourself. ... Allow Yourself to the Pain You Feel. ... Be Yourself. ... Practice Mindfulness. More items... •

choosingtherapy.com - How to Stop Thinking About Someone: 14 Ways to Get Them Off Your Mind

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Usually, one of the leading reasons for continually thinking about someone is due to a breakup with a significant other. Most people have experienced this stress of having a relationship end at least once in their adult lifetime. But whether you can’t stop thinking about someone because of a breakup, a lasting crush or some other reason, there are several things you can do to to start refocusing on yourself and getting them off of your mind. “The very act of trying to stop thinking about someone (or anything) makes us think about them more,” says Dr. Joanne Davila. “For example, right now, don’t think of a white elephant. What did you just think about? So, we end up ruminating about the person, which increases our negative mood and leads to more rumination.When the thoughts come, don’t get angry at yourself. Let yourself know it’s OK, you’re just going to not engage them, and remind yourself that you’re doing your best. Let yourself know that over time, by not feeding the thoughts, they will eventually lessen.”

Here are 14 tips for how to stop thinking about someone:

Many times, people want to “remain friends” after a breakup. This leads to more heartache and less time to heal. When healing, people need space to care for themselves. Contact with the other person leads to caring about what the other person thinks instead of what you need for yourself.

2. Stop Looking at Their Social Media

Looking at their social media page will keep the feelings you have stirred up. Looking at “happy posts” on social media can actually have a negative impact on your mental health. You will continue to feel hurt as you see them moving on or posting something that is unflattering about you in their social media. The best thing to do is delete them from your social media.

3. Turn to Your Support System

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During this time, your family and friends are going to want to make sure that you are okay. Allow yourself to share your feelings with them and let them be there for you. They will understand and listen to what you say and might have some good advice on how to get over the relationship.

4. Focus on Self-Acceptance

Use this time to look at yourself and grow. Find worth within yourself instead of extracting it from another person’s approval. Focusing on your self worth can build self esteem and allow you to create a more loving relationship with yourself.

5. Love Yourself

You deserve the same love that you would give anyone else. If you have a challenging time loving yourself, now is the time to start. Giving yourself affirmations is one way you can start the process. You can also show yourself love by taking care of yourself.

6. Allow Yourself to the Pain You Feel

Often when a person is hurting, they want to mask it or find a way to stuff it. Instead, allow yourself to feel the pain and sit with it. This will help you to be able to deal with the pain and move on.

7. Be Yourself

Remember first and foremost that you are you. You do not have to try to be who anyone else wants you to be, you just need to be yourself. You can change for yourself, but you should not change for another person. Be proud of who you are.

8. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is about staying present in the here and now. Practice ways you can do that so that you won’t focus on the other so much. Remember that you have a lot to look forward to in the here and now.

choosingtherapy.com - How to Stop Thinking About Someone: 14 Ways to Get Them Off Your Mind

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