How can I turn my wife on in the mood?

7 Ways to Get Your Wife in the Mood Understand it's not all about you. ... Give her intimacy without expecting sex in return. ... Do your best to make sure she is not exhausted at the end of the day. ... Be equal partners in the marriage. ... Support and encourage your wife as a complete human being. More items...

allprodad.com - 7 Ways to Get Your Wife in the Mood - All Pro Dad

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Frank has been married to Tracy for 15 years and he is frustrated with their sex life. What used to happen every night (and some days, too) has dwindled to a couple of times a month at best. He understands that sometimes hormones mean she isn’t in the mood, but that can’t be why she’s never in the mood. What Frank doesn’t realize is Tracy is frustrated, too. Because while Frank misses sex, what his wife misses is intimacy. The good news is Frank and Tracy both can enjoy intimacy at its most satisfying. But Frank can only get there if he thinks about Tracy’s needs ahead of his own. The same is true for your marriage. Here are 7 ways to get your wife in the mood.

1. Understand it’s not all about you.

The key word in marriage is relationship. The key word in sex is “her,” not “me.” Think about sex in terms of what she enjoys, her emotional needs, her pleasure. It really is in giving that we receive.

Great sex is not transactional; it is relational.

2. Give her intimacy without expecting sex in return.

Great sex is not transactional; it is relational. Even when her hormones say, “I’m not interested,” being present anyway says, “I love you.” So put your partner’s needs ahead of your own (and read 5 Ways to Turn Your Wife on Without Touching Her). 3. Do your best to make sure she is not exhausted at the end of the day. Exhaustion (especially when it’s the result of an unequal workload) is not conducive to lovemaking. Lighten her workload.

4. Be equal partners in the marriage.

This builds on the previous point. Cook and clean together. Make financial decisions as a couple. Share child-related responsibilities. Serve her when she is tired. Be a PTA dad.

5. Support and encourage your wife as a complete human being.

Does your wife know she is admired, valued, respected, and encouraged? Communicate her value to her. 6. Make a list of the reasons you fell in love with her. Now fall in love all over again. Remember the pursuit? Remember the infatuation? Remember how ready you were for that first kiss? Taking sex for granted is a dead-end pursuit. But working hard to grow the relationship may lead to, you know, other things.

7. Take care of yourself and get into better shape.

Take an honest look at your health, your physique, your weight, the way you dress, the care you take. Make an effort.

Sound off: How has putting your wife’s needs first helped to bring you closer together?

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mindbodygreen.com - How Often Married Couples Have Sex (Per Week & By Age)

Among people in their 70s, a 2015 study1 published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior found 33% of sexually active men and 36% of sexually active women had sex at least twice a month. For people in their 80s, 19% of sexually active men and 32% of sexually active women had sex at least twice a month. According to the International Society for Sexual Medicine, the 2010 National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior found almost 25% of partnered women over age 70 had sex more than four times a week. "Frequency of sex seems to decrease overall as couples age," Howard says. Though citing studies on older adults' sex lives like those above, she adds: "Age is just a number!" Lauren Fogel Mersy, PsyD, psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist, adds: "All aspects of our sexuality can change as we age. Arousal and orgasms might take longer, desire can lower, and sexual frequency can certainly decline, particularly as a relationship matures over years. Of course, this won't be true for everyone, but it is common."

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