Infatuation Rules
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How can I get my wife to be more exciting in bed?

Start with these simple (yet sexy) strategies. 6 Easy Ways To Spice Up Your Married Sex Life. Making things more interesting in the bedroom doesn't have to be hard. ... Try something new. ... Make out like teenagers. ... Schedule romantic activities. ... Share your fantasies. ... Watch a sexy DVD. ... See a sex therapist.

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1. Try something new.

Over time, most couples adopt a fairly predictable sexual script, says Needle. To change things up, try something new. Start with something simple like a different position or adding a blind fold to shift your sensory experience, suggests Ellen Barnard, MSSW, a sex educator and counselor in Madison, Wisconsin. You could also introduce sex toys, role play, dress up, or change the scenery.

2. Make out like teenagers.

At the beginning of a relationship, couples enjoy deep, sexy kissing, and they touch each other in arousing ways, says Needle. But as a relationship matures, that lovey-dovey behavior can take a backseat to chores and mundane activities. Channel your inner teenager and kiss, hug, and snuggle your partner like you did when you first met. Doing so will help keep your marriage sexually alive.

3. Schedule romantic activities.

“Taking time out to spend with your partner is one of the most loving things you can do for each other,” says Susan Kaye, PhD, a sex therapist located in San Antonio and Austin, Texas, and Philadelphia. “I suggest that couples get a copy of the book 8 Erotic Nights, which offers eight sensual activities that will show you and your partner how to please each other.” Take turns picking out an activity and you'll connect more passionately with your partner.

4. Share your fantasies.

“Fantasies are underutilized by couples,” says Roger Libby, PhD, a sex therapist and adjunct professor and distinguished lecturer at the Institute for the Advanced Study of Sexuality in San Francisco. “But it’s important to use your imagination and share your most erotic desires with your partner.” If you’re feeling shy, set the mood by lighting some candles, turning off electronics, and playing romantic music. Once you’re both feeling relaxed and intimate, open up to your significant other.

5. Watch a sexy DVD.

“I recommend couples watch and discuss The Better Sex Video Series, which is a compilation of sex education pieces,” says Dr. Libby. “It shows real life couples exploring sexual positions and techniques and talking about what they enjoy.” You’ll learn Kama Sutra positions, sexual anatomy (including the elusive G-spot), erotic massage, and the four fundamentals of foreplay (oral sex, erotic talk, sensual touch, and kissing).

6. See a sex therapist.

Still feeling stuck in a rut? Consider seeing a certified sex therapist. “Therapy is not necessarily reserved for problems,” says Needle. “It can be about education, growth, and sexual development." To find a sex therapist near you, check out the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists.

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What is a toxic spouse?

Simply put, a toxic relationship is one in which partners don't support each other. Instead, one person is always trying to undermine the other. There is a sense of competitiveness instead of support. Negative experiences far outnumber the positive ones.

In a healthy marriage, partners are emotionally supportive, trustworthy, loyal, and loving. They enjoy each other’s company, are committed to raising a family (if they have one), and have admiration and respect for one another.

Sounds simple, right?

But in the real world, marriages are far more complicated. Maintaining a successful relationship requires immense effort. Once the rush of endorphins is over, the illusions quickly shatter and a partner’s imperfections become obvious. And while it’s perfectly normal to have waxing and waning intimacy, even disagreements, what’s not acceptable is a toxic marriage, which can play havoc with your health and happiness. Living with a toxic person should never be an option. The first step in fixing an unhealthy relationship is understanding what are the signs of a toxic marriage. And if fixing it doesn’t work, then you should learn how to get out of a toxic marriage.

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