Infatuation Rules
Photo: Tatiana Syrikova
At around age 78 and 8 months, you reach the break-even point, when your cumulative benefits from claiming at 67 surpass those you'd get by taking retirement at 62.
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Read More »Social Security retirement benefits are primarily based on two factors: your average income over your working life and your age when you claim them. You get to decide when to start collecting benefits, within an eight-year window from age 62 to age 70. The longer you wait, the higher your monthly payment will be. That means choosing when to file for Social Security is in part a decision between collecting a smaller benefit for a longer period and starting later but getting a bigger monthly payment. If you live long enough, the cumulative benefits from the later, higher start will eventually catch up with the sum of reduced payments you can start drawing earlier. That catch-up moment is called the break-even age (or break-even point), at which the dollar value of claiming benefits later surpasses the value of taking them early. Determining your break-even point and weighing it alongside other factors such as your physical and financial health can help you decide when to start Social Security and get the most out of your benefits over your lifetime. AARP Membership — $12 for your first year when you sign up for Automatic Renewal Get instant access to members-only products and hundreds of discounts, a free second membership, and a subscription to AARP the Magazine. Join Now
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If you're experiencing too much anxiety, guilt, shame, and resentment, those are signs that you have absorbed far more responsibility than you were supposed to, leading to emotional burnout and oscillating feelings of numbness and anger, Kim says. If you've reached your breaking point, she recommends doing what's best for you and ending the relationship. "If the partner responds with defensiveness, blame, or gaslighting, then it's not likely that much will change in the relationship anytime soon," Kim says. "Unless the partner voluntarily chooses to own their own choices and responsibilities, the relationship is set up to stay one-sided. The irresponsible party has a vested interest in keeping the one-sidedness going and maintaining the status quo because they could afford to not do anything further."
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